Latest desktop woes

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Latest desktop woes

Postby Slim » Fri May 19, 2017 5:48 am

So this friggin' "creator's update" Microsoft has come out with. Creators. Yeah. Subtitle it, "Creating new problems for my desktop." Not just new problems. This slimy little update has opened up a goddamn pandora's box of problems.

The most annoying problem: I can't sim anymore. Because, invariably, there is a fifty percent chance of Pinnacle crashing my CPU as I'm ending a recording. Thanks, Microsoft, you shitstain on the fabric of humanity.

Second most annoying problem: My crappy Avast doesn't scan for viruses. It just proudly stays stuck at zero percent for hours, while flipping me a middle finger as I shout obscenities at it. Of course, this has nothing to do with the update, but it does make it impossible for me to verify precisely whether it is indeed this little update that's the problem and not some virus I don't know about.

Two questions. I want to get rid of this update. I want it to die. I want it to die in as painful a manner as possible while choking on all the ones and zeros of binary language. I want it stripped dead. I want this wretched update to experience the programming equivalent of what it would be like to have your skin roasted on the inside. I want this update to go the way of the dinosaur, but approximately 317,456 times more violently. I would just do it myself, you know I'm pretty sure I can buy a mighty fine baseball bat for just that purpose at Canadian Tire or somewhere, but it seems a bit extreme, and to be honest, I really don't have the energy for that after spending the last thirty minutes cussing erratically.

So, question number one is, how would I go about killing this horrible update?

Question number two: Since Avast has displayed they're about as useful as a piece of flypaper stuck to the rear end of a brain-damaged horse, are there any actual alternatives out there that don't require me to pay out my butthole while programmers hold court in some shitty office, exchanging laughter as they discuss how to lure idiots like me into downloading free software that doesn't actually do anything in the hopes of leveraging me into a paid subscription?

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Re: Latest desktop woes

Postby brick9mm » Fri May 19, 2017 6:05 am

A quick google search revealed that you can supposedly uninstall updates manually. ... ws-update/

On Windows 10, you can uninstall updates by searching "View installed updates" and right click the update(s) that are giving you problems, a box will come up with a single option, Uninstall.

I suggest Malwarebytes.

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Re: Latest desktop woes

Postby fullMETAL » Thu Jun 15, 2017 8:29 pm

I second Malwarebytes AS WELL AS recommending Spybot: Search & Destroy.
Escargot in 5 minutes or your dignity back!

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Old Baby
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Re: Latest desktop woes

Postby Old Baby » Thu Jun 15, 2017 9:47 pm

Malwarebytes and Ccleaner to keep your computer clean like a baby's butt.

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Re: Latest desktop woes

Postby C-Drive » Thu Jun 15, 2017 11:11 pm

Listen, Slim, make a general thread for your personal tech issues.

Every month you make a new thread asking for advice.
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